Happy Valentine’s Day???


Last night, I called Cheesecake Factory to place an order for takeout.  The wait was an hour.  Normally, it’s like 15 minutes.  When I arrived to pick up my takeout the place was mobbed.  Seriously.  There were people everywhere…in the lobby, outside, on the benches in front of the Whole Foods next door.  While I was waiting for my order I heard the hostess tell someone that there was a two-hour wait for a table.  Two hours!  There were so many people waiting that they ran out of pagers.

I asked the woman at the takeout counter what was up with all the people.  She replied “It’s really busy because of the holiday.”  I stared back at her with a blank, confused look on my face…because holiday?  What holiday?  She realized I had no idea what she was talking about so she added “You know, Valentine’s Day is tomorrow.”  Oh…right Valentine’s Day is tomorrow.  I had no idea until that very second.

I went home and casually mentioned the conversation to J.  His response…”Valentine’s Day is tomorrow…really?”  I guess I’m not getting a V-Day gift this year.

And really…it’s kind of OK with me.  See…I used to expect things…cards, flowers, chocolates, dinner…big romantic gestures.  Every single year I would be disappointed when J didn’t live up to my expectations.  Sure, we would actually go to dinner…provided I made reservations somewhere and reminded J like a thousand times.  I’d also usually get a card and some kind of small, last minute gift from the card store across the street from the office.  I only got roses the year that we had a major fight and I refused to speak to him the entire month of February.  Last year he bought me the world’s biggest box of candy…but that is because his life was threatened. 

This year I’ve just decided to accept that J is not a Valentine’s Day kind of guy.  He’s not really much of a romantic at all.  He’s really practical and logical and he feels that spending $80 on generic flowers that are going to die in a few days is not the way he wants to show his love.  I’m ok with that.  He shows me he loves me in other ways…like baking me a cake or leaving me the last of the mac and cheese. 

I’ve also decided that I’m not going to make a big fuss over a gift for him either.  Instead of getting him candy and cards and some stupid gift that he’s not going to use anyway, I’ve decided to get him chicken wings for dinner from his favorite place…the tiny little hole in the wall that is always so crowded and I hate going to with the fire of a thousand suns.  See…I’m all good at the romance too.

And if he really doesn’t do anything for me…I’m going to buy myself a present and send him the bill!

What are your V-Day plans?


  1. You know what? I’d rather have 25 bouquets of wildflowers from the grocery store than one vase of roses on Valentine’s Day. It’s a cute holiday and everything, but it’s not romantic in the least to me.

  2. I completely agree with Amanda!! And I think you are *finally* on to something, love. J doesn’t strike me as a suit and tie, French restaurant kind of guy. He wants chicken wings and to be curled up with his favorite girl and favorite 4-legged children (not to be confused with 2 legged/2 wheeled children). And if, at the end of the day, he has nothing to offer, I think Vuitton should get a visit. It’s really what he would want anyway. Guys want us to make life easy for them..like their mothers. So, make it easy. And Happy Holidays to you (OK that just sounds bizarre). I guess The Cheesecake Factory is the new Olive Garden…

  3. I have to say: I think you picking up dinner from his favorite restaurant sounds incredibly sweet/romantic to me. It’s not always about the flowers, the cards, the chocolates… It’s really in the little things you do for each other to show that you care, and this shouldn’t be celebrated on Valentine’s Day alone. I say this because there’s a teensy bit of jealousy that my coworker got a dozen roses first thing this morning.


    At least my other coworker brought in brownies, so that kind of makes up for it :)

    Wishing you and J a happy Valentine’s Day!!! As for me, I’m getting my drink on later. What else is new? LOL!

    (Also, who would wait on that kind of a line to get dinner?! I like Cheesecake Factory and all but that’s crazy! You were smart do to the takeout)

  4. Wilzie and I have never done anything for Valentine’s Day. It used to bother me – but like J baking you a cake – he does random, sweet things for me all the time.
    Although the chicken wings sounds like a great idea…
    Enjoy your day, whatever it may be!

  5. Oh we are like the same person. I used paint these elaborate movie-love romantic days in my head and then be SHOCKED that the Boy did not plan anything of the sort… or anything at all really. This year, we got eachother a little something – but my gift is a cookbook that I was going to buy for myself anyway… did just that and told him – here you got this for me for Valentines Day. Works for me.
    As for flowers, I heard on the radio this morning “don’t get her lillies, or carnations. NO carnations.” you know what? I LIKE carnations. It’s the thought and they last for freakin’ ever!
    I say, less pressure on boys, more everyday love, and bring on the carnations.
    Happy v-day!

  6. I am way more in favor of doing something thoughtful for V day (or any day) like chicken wings than something that’s Valentine’s specific or heart shaped. I bet he will love his chicken wings.

  7. We’re not into Valentine’s Day either. It’s pricey and crowded at restaurants, I hate hearts and don’t care for red in general, and I don’t have much of a taste for chocolate. Last year was our first as a married couple, and my mom and grandma were appalled that we weren’t going to do anything. I love my husband every day, I do things for him every day. Not because I have to. Because I love him and want him to be happy. He does the same for me. Candy and roses don’t express love to me. Washing my car, walking the dogs when I’m tired, and cleaning up even after he cooked express love to me. Last year though, he felt bad and got me a couple roses and a box of chocolates (which he ate) and I stuck to my “we don’t celebrate Valentime’s day!” and didn’t get him anything. Guess who felt like a schmuck? This girl. So today when I go grocery shopping, I’ll pick him up a little something, and I expect nothing in return.

    We do, however, celebrate Steak and BJ Day on March 14th. But we don’t tell my mom that 😉

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