A tale of dumplings…

You need to know a couple of things before I continue…

  1. I love Chinese food.  Seriously.  I would eat it every day.  As it is I eat it at least once a week.
  2. I get really cranky and nasty when I’m hungry.

Ever since we moved to Westchester, J and I haven’t been able to find a really good Chinese restaurant.  At least not one that we agree on.  There is one that I like, but J complains about it all the time.  He says they don’t have good dumplings.  Because he doesn’t like it, I usually only order it on Thursday nights when he’s out. 

Last night I was craving Chinese food like crazy and J was starving.  He would have agreed to eat anything at that point, so Chinese food it was.  We walked in the house and he thrust the phone in my direction and asked me to order right away, which I did.  That was 6:45 and they assured me they would be there in 35-40 minutes. 

At 7:15, J’s Blackberry rang and he had to take a work call.  That meant I had to keep the dogs entertained and quiet so he could hear.  I figured that, per Murphy’s Law, the delivery man would show up at that moment, ring the door bell and the dogs would go wild.  In order to avoid that scenario, I stood by the door with my shoes on, peering out the window, ready to run out at the first sight of his car pulling up.  I also bribed the dogs with snacks to keep them sitting quietly at my feet.

By 8:15, J’s call was long over, but there was still no food.  Now I was starving too…and quickly becoming a bitch.  J was driving me crazy because he was whining that we never should have ordered from there in the first place.  He kept making me call the restaurant to find out the status.  Ten minutes after my third call and the third time of being told that he would be there “soon…5 more minutes”, I completely lost it.  I called a fourth time and cancelled the order.  The woman on the phone was very apologetic, but I was having none of it. 

I hung up the phone and told J to decide between Wendy’s and McDonald’s.  Thirty seconds later my phone rang.  The woman from the restaurant was calling to tell me that my food would arrive within 60 seconds and because I’m such a good customer (I am…it’s ridiculous how much Chinese food I eat), I should keep the order and she would not charge me.  She apologized again and explained that she was short on delivery men, which is why it was taking so long.  I thanked her and hung up. 

Ten minutes later the guy finally showed up and I was really rude to him.  I basically grabbed the bag from his hand and slammed the door in his face.  It was all kinds of nasty and I felt really bad after.  J asked me if I gave him a tip.  I laughed…because a tip?  In my world you don’t get a tip when it takes you two hours to deliver food.  J reminded me that the people were really nice and…after all, they weren’t even charging us.  I guess I should have tipped him.  Ooops. 

I have to say…the food was delicious.  I cracked open the dumplings before I even sat down and had downed 4 of them before J even brought me a plate.  It wasn’t the most ladylike behavior, but I was so hungry.  Once I had some food, all was right with the world again and I spent the rest of the evening laughing at J’s bad jokes. 

I guess the moral of the story is…don’t stand between me and my Chinese food when I’m starving!

Oh…and when they give you free food you should at least tip the guy.


  1. I am the opposite…I am an obessessive tipper, even when it is far from deserved (except at a restaurant, if my service is bad…no tip for you!).
    If you abuse me while you cut my hair, I will tip you.
    If you paint my toenails a poopy-brown colour when I’m pretty sure the one I picked was more purple-y, I will tip you.
    I think its my incessant need to be liked…and I’m pretty its working…

  2. I love, love, love Chinese food and now that I’ve Japanese food it’s off the chain as well. I am the same way you are don’t F with me when I’m hungry. I get cranky and might eat your arm off!

    2 Hours is way too long!!! I would have lost my shizz! :)

  3. I’ve had many a not-my-finest-moment when I’m starving and the world is just not co-operating with me! You can find out who the delivery boy was and tip him extra next time (or drop some $ by the restaurant for him in an envelope). I’m sure he’ll appreciate it and make sure you get your food pronto next time.

  4. A tip would have probably been nice but I completely understand your mood and your behavior. When I am hungry, I get super crabby. EXTREMELY unpleasant. It’s not pretty.

  5. Its understandable to not tip when you are crazy hungry. It took my awhile to find a Chinese restaurant I liked in my city but I finally did and it’s called something like China’s Best. And my husband was like Duh. Why haven’t we been going here all along. It’s China’s Best afterall.

  6. i am like a baby–i literally cannot function if i am either hungry or tired…or have to go to the bathroom. whenever i’m rude to wait people/delivery people, no matter how awful they might have been, i feel terrible and guilty and like i should apologize to everyone around me. i’m kind of a wimp like that.

  7. LOL, I’m totally the same way. I feel as though I can’t focus on anything else and get EXTREMELY cranky. I don’t blame you for not tipping; 2 hours is an insanely long amount of time to wait!

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