Smoking or Non???

I am a non-smoker.  I’m not just a non-smoker…I’m the most annoying kind of non-smoker…I lecture people and I make a big deal about the smell and I wave smoke away from my face.  I make it very well known that I hate smoking and I think it’s a gross and disgusting habit. 

The thing is…I was a smoker.  All through high school and most of college I smoked…a lot.  Marlboro Lights and sometimes Camel Lights.  I smoked in my car and sometimes in my house.  When I went to college, I would stand outside between classes and freeze my ass off for a smoke.  I would sneak cigarettes in the stairwell so I didn’t have to go 10 flights down to smoke. 

I started smoking for the same reason most stupid kids start…because my friends were doing it and I thought it made me look cool.  I kept smoking for the same reasons.  Also, because it gave me something to do with my hands when I was drinking.  I never loved it though.  It was just something I did. 

One day I realized that it was just so stupid and it was affecting my asthma too much, so I quit.  Just like that.  No gum, no patches, no hypnosis.  I just stopped.  I mean, I’d have one cigarette every now and again, but I was no longer a smoker.  That was about 14 years ago.

J likes to smoke, though he’s not a heavy smoker.  He’s more of a social smoker.  When we went to Aruba we bought a carton of cigarettes at duty-free because he wanted to smoke while we were on vacation and didn’t want to pay $15 for a pack.  He didn’t even go through one pack while we were gone, so we had a lot left over when we got home.  They are finally almost gone.

Friday night, J went out for drinks after work and I picked him up at the train station later on.  He asked me to bring him a pack of cigarettes so he could have one in the car.  I got to the train station early and I decided to have one cigarette while I was waiting for him. 

And I liked it way too much. I like the taste and the feeling of the smoke in my lungs and the slight head rush I got.  I liked it so much, in fact, that I had another one on Saturday night.  J saw me having the second one and said “What’s with you and all the smoking?”.  All the smoking?  It was two cigarettes.  That’s hardly a lot.

When I woke up on Sunday I had a gross taste in my mouth and my throat was sore.  I started to wonder why and then I remembered that I’d smoked right before I went to bed.  That’s when I remembered why I’m a non-smoker. 

Those two cigarettes were great, but they are the last ones I will have for a long time.  If you are a smoker, you should quit, too.

Comments

  1. Yep, I used to smoke when I drank in college. Then I realized that the grossest feeling that I had after a night of drinking was not the hangover but the cigarette taste and phlegm in my throat. I haven’t smoked in years now. And yeah, now I think it’s gross when people are smoking around me.

  2. I quit smoking when I started dating Wilzie, and although I find it disgusting, I fear that I would enjoy it if I were to pick one up again…So instead I just focus on being the annoying non-smoker, which is almost as much fun 😉

  3. I have never smoked and I never plan to. I think it’s a disgusting, yucky habit. I know that sounds terribly judgemental, but unfortunately I am a very judging person. Good for you for quitting!

  4. Non-smoker here. I’ve never liked smoking. I was the 3 year old that told my mother “Mommy ashtray out – you can’t smoke in here anymore”

    I have smoked twice in my life and didn’t get it – and never cared that others thought it was cool because well I hated the smell. I hated feeling like my clothing smelled like smoke from my parents. Thankfully all my friends smoked @ school so I didn’t matter.

    My boyfriend quit when I moved here which made me thankful, I didn’t want to have to have the fight about where he could or couldn’t smoke.

    I’ve just never been a fan – keep on the good side girl for your health :) oxox

  5. I’ve been a smoker for a very long time. I’ve wrestled with quitting for about two years now. I’ll stop, then start and back and forth. I gain weight, lose weight and kick my own ass the entire time. I know smoking is bad, it effects my athsma too. I will beat it someday. Each time I quit its for longer and longer. I’ve tried cold turkey and had horrible withdrawls, I tried Wellbutrin and it made me cold and numb emotionally, I tried Chantix and decided it was a miricle drug until I went off it and suddenly the cravings hit me like a freight train. It was like Chantix was a dam, holding them back and when I stopped taking it they all flooded me. I went back on it for a while, quit smoking again and started again and quit again. This time I have to stay off of it. I’ll have to quit on my own. Chantix isn’t approved for use as long as I’ve been taking it. *sigh* One day I’ll get there.

  6. I smoked in college too, and quit when my husband almost caught me. I realized I didn’t want him to be dating a smoker so I, too, quit cold turkey. I still crave one now and then, but then I remember that it won’t be as enjoyable as it was 3 years ago: it’ll taste like an ash tray then and the next morning, my throat will be sore, my clothes will smell. But there are times I miss it. I just wonder why my will power to quit smoking doesn’t translate to weight loss…

  7. I can’t stand it when people are smoking near me. I think I have smoked twice in my life. Once was when I was super intoxicated and just had walked like 3 miles at 1 am. That night was later referred to “as the night Jenni was so intoxicated she smoked”. I was so happy when in January it became NC law for no smoking in restaurants and bars!

  8. I’m also a social smoker, though there was a time in my life when I smoked on a regular basis (I blame my study abroad experience for that one). But it’s a terrible habit to kick. Just having that one ciggy is sometimes all it takes for me to realize how much I miss the act of smoking. I do the same as J: I buy cigarettes when I’m on vacation or just in the mood, but I try to remind myself often enough that they are a treat and to keep the smoking to a minimum (gross to think of them as a “treat” though, huh??).

    Good for you for realizing how gross the habit is.

  9. I’m a secret smoker. Like a social smoker, but all private like. No one knows it, not my co-workers, most family, etc. I don’t know why, I just am. I hate the smell and take to brushing, washing and lotioning and stuff afterward.
    It’s so weird, because it’s an awful lot of work. Must be the danger that attracts me, I dunno. Dumb.

  10. I think together we would be excellent advocates for The Quit Smoking campaign. I sort of smoked in college, never without a drink in my hand. And I had the same experience, sore throat, nasty taste, and my asthma was constantly giving me the middle finger. I think my smoking lasted about 6 months. Now, giving up other smokable items was not quite so easy but marry someone who is owned by the government and that habit goes bye-bye pretty quickly, too. Congrats on giving it up. Again. If only we could get my MIL in on this. She is going to give us all lung cancer via secondhand smoke. And what an el crapo way to die…from lung cancer from someone else’s smoke! But that would be just like my MIL…

  11. My husband smokes. I know! It’s gross. Not in the house though – that’s forbidden. But it’s still yucky. I always make sure his life insurance is up to date though – just in case.

Speak Your Mind

*