For those of you who don’t know, I’m Allyson of Magnolias and Mimosas and I’ll be entertaining you today while Shana is stalking Orlando Bloom enjoying quality time with J.
Over at my crib, we celebrate Champagne Fridays (which can also double as Bourbon Fridays (don’t ask, it’s a Kentucky thing) or Diet Coke Fridays (stupid pregnancy) or Water Fridays (stupid, stupid unemployment)). It’s really just to remind us that life is too short to eat from paper plates and drink Boone’s Farm. Sometimes you have to just let the cork fly. Even if it’s not a cork, exactly, as I discovered last Friday when I bought the last bottle of something bubbly that set me back $5.49. They don’t put a cork, per se, in those. I thought you should know. I was sort of flooded with temporary disappointment and I would like to prepare you for that.
I also do Top Five Friday, listing the interesting events that have happened to me or whatever I’ve discovered over the past week. As I write this at 8:25 AM on Wednesday morning, I can say that not a lot has happened thus far. Well, not a lot that I can post on the world wide web right now (which has everything to do with being in the military and nothing to do with the goat we have tied to the pergola in the back yard, wearing a days-of-the-week thong). So, let me just spin a tale about The Great Glue Catastrophe of Saturday morning, to which, I’m sure, every single one of you will be able to relate.
I own a jewelry business, Daisy & Elm, LLC. I create handmade and unique jewelry and sell it here, on the Internets. Everything is one-of-a-kind so I taunt everyone who visits my page with: “See it. Love it. Buy it. There’s only one of everything, so get yours and make the other girls jealous.” Which is exactly how girls think, by the way. Life is like Prom. If you walk in and someone else is wearing your dress, you would pretty much just rather go naked. I do not want to walk into a job interview or a party or run into my third ex-fiance’s girlfriend wearing the same jewelry I am wearing. So, I don’t shop at Kohl’s anymore. I make mine. And I make it for everyone else, too. Anyawesome, I made a couple of headbands last weekend. They were created using a simple silver wire headband and a shell flower, about 2 inches in diameter. The first flower was larger, almost 3 inches, and I was able to wire it to the headband. Easy cheesy. I wired it on, posed on the patio for hubs to photograph it, and posted it on my Fan Page (which I just have to stop here for a second and say…Facebook no longer lets people become your “fans”. You can now only “like” a Fan Page. Well, I think that is the horse’s arse because in this world, I have a lot of people who “like” me…I don’t have that many “fans”. On the really craptastic days, it was so nice to open up my Fan Page and see that I had 105 FANS. Now I see that 105 people like me. It’s as if someone put a shotgun shell through my ovation box…y’know the box you open and all you hear is your very own, personal, standing ovation?? I don’t have one of those anymore. Thanks a lot, Facebook!)
The second flower was E-6000’d on to the headband…which is to say that it was glued on with some sort of adhesive that is known to cause cancer in like 5 states, but especially California because they don’t mess around out there. It only causes cancer during the inhalation, so fret not, little buyers, you are safe once it dries. And usually, it dries to a rock-hard consistency….I mean bomb blasts and a plane crash couldn’t destroy E-6000. But apparently, putting the headband in my hair and sitting on the porch for hubs to take a picture was enough to cause instant disintegration. The flower sat in my lap…sad, lonely, grossly unattached. And that is when the Great Search for the Perfect Adhesive began…last Saturday on my back porch. Since then, I have tried hot glue, Super Glue (which I try not to use because, in spite of the warnings all over the package, I still glue my fingers together. Every time. I’ve been doing this since I started using Super Glue….approximately 140 years ago. How is it that I still haven’t learned?), more E-6000 (which just ended up being more E-6000, not any more gluey), Jewelry Glue (a huge waste of my $5.99), and Gorilla Glue (which lasted for about .7 seconds). And yet, here I am. I’ve come full-circle. Still holding the shell flower in one hand and a naked silver wire in the other. A fellow craftsman suggested two-part Epoxy, which is my next step (and yes, that was highly entertaining to all of the Lowe’s employees who watched me stand and read the back of every single Epoxy package trying to determine if concrete Epoxy would really hold like concrete or only hold concrete…whether I wanted a double syringe or two separate tubes…finally calling hubs, which is not like phoning-a-friend. He would be one of those “well, love….I’m about 59% sure…” people.) In the end, I went with the “ORIGINAL Soft-Weld”…J and B Weld, which I guess is used to glue cars back together, so I feel good about that.
Want to see how it turns out? Come visit me at Magnolias and Mimosas! In the meantime, thank you for indulging me as I run up a 1000-word tab on Shana’s space. She’s a gem and I simply puffy pink heart her and all of her adventures. If you followed me over from M&M, give Shana a follow. You won’t be sorry. She sees Orlando Bloom, which is not at all like seeing dead people. It’s waaaayyyyy hotter!